| Six Steps To Stop Self-Sabotage Now | | | | embrace your wholenessrather than your brokenness. |
| Copyright © 2005 Eve Delunas, Ph.D. | | | | Everything you have lived hasstrengthened your |
| Inner Vision Resources | | | | psychological immune system. Recognize yourcapacity |
| Are you a captive of your past? Or have you | | | | to thrive in spite of the hardships that have comeyour |
| released the pastand liberated yourself from its hold on | | | | way, and watch your life begin to mirror your |
| you? When you refuseto allow your history to imprison | | | | moreempowered sense of Self. |
| you, you choose a path ofself-determination. Letting go | | | | 2. Retire your need to blame anyone-including your |
| of the past is your personal | | | | self-foryour present unhappiness. Blame only weighs |
| "declaration of independence" from anything in your | | | | you down withunnecessary baggage that inhibits you |
| earlieryears that could limit your creative potential or | | | | from moving forward. |
| prevent youfrom living your best life. | | | | Release blame and feel yourself lighten up. |
| How can you tell if past events are still having a | | | | 3. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Everybody |
| negativeeffect on you today? Here are three signs to | | | | makesthem-that's how we learn. Stop berating |
| look for: | | | | yourself with yourso-called failures, and use that extra |
| 1. Certain situations trigger extreme, out-of-control | | | | energy to create thelife you desire today. |
| emotionalreactions. It feels as if you go on "auto-pilot" | | | | 4. Make peace with your past. If certain unpleasant |
| and havelittle or no control over the way you feel or | | | | memoriesstill hold a high degree of emotional charge, |
| behave oncecertain internal buttons have been pushed. | | | | let a qualifiedtherapist assist you in healing those |
| For example, Martatrembles with fear at the thought | | | | wounds to loosen thepsychological hold those |
| of asserting herself withher boss, who overburdens | | | | traumatic episodes have on you. |
| Marta with an excessive workload. | | | | 5. Change the thoughts you entertain about yourself. |
| Joe goes into a rage when he believes he is being | | | | Monitoryour mental landscape to avoid habitual, |
| accused ofmaking an error, however insignificant. Ben | | | | self-limiting waysof thinking. When you catch yourself |
| is consumed withjealousy when he catches his | | | | engaging in old thoughtpatterns like, "I don't deserve to |
| girlfriend smiling at a stranger. | | | | be happy" or "I'm not goodenough," deliberately choose |
| 2. All of the logical solutions and practical approaches | | | | new thoughts that feel better toyou. |
| tochanging your out-of-control reactions have failed. | | | | 6. Stop using your past as a point of comparison to |
| Your headmay say "this is ridiculous" but you can't | | | | your presentand future. No matter what you have |
| stop yourself fromover-reacting with anger, sadness, | | | | lived before, today canbe different. Instead of focusing |
| fear, shame, guilt, orjealousy to a situation that just | | | | on how your life has been,place your attention on how |
| doesn't merit that kind ofemotional energy. | | | | you want your life to be. Keepyour eye on the road |
| 3. You keep making the same unhealthy choices over | | | | ahead rather than the one behind you,and watch your |
| and overagain. Although you may vow that you are | | | | life take you to the places you have dreamedof going! |
| going to set a newcourse, your default mode is set on | | | | As you let go of your past, you free yourself to live |
| self-destruct. You can'tseem to keep yourself from | | | | the lifeyou truly desire. Step into the Now, and discover |
| repeating the same mistakes-eventhough you know | | | | the unlimitedpotential for joy that awaits you there. |
| better. Elizabeth continues to haverelationships with | | | | Eve Delunas, Ph.D., psychotherapist, author, speaker, |
| married men, despite of years of heartachefrom other | | | | trainer |
| married lovers. Mark lies to his manager | | | | Offers proven strategies to help you rise above your |
| andcoworkers, although that behavior led to Mark's | | | | limitationsand soar. Breaking the Spell of the |
| dismissalfrom his last two jobs. | | | | Past--Book and Guided |
| What can you do if you are under the negative spell | | | | Visualization CD set. Take a FREE QUIZ to find out if |
| of your past? | | | | you are |
| Here are some steps you can take which will | | | | SPELLBOUND by your past. Download a FREE |
| neutralize the effectthat the past has on you: | | | | guided meditation torelieve stress and feel more |
| 1. Reclaim your power by refusing to think of yourself | | | | peaceful. Sign up for a FREE monthlyezine called |
| as avictim. This does not mean you deny the bad | | | | AWAKENING INNER VISION: RESOURCES FOR |
| things that havehappened to you. Rather, it means you | | | | ENLIGHTENMENT. |