| The words "take responsibility" are heard everywhere; | | | | accept that I am responsible for my feelings, until I next |
| they seem to be part of our contemporary vocabulary | | | | fall out with my partner and feel angry or upset with |
| for living. Oprah Winfrey has said that she believed the | | | | something she said or did. What people find so hard to |
| world's problems would be resolved if only people | | | | see is that there is a difference between something |
| learned to take responsibility. For the person interested | | | | happening or somebody saying or doing something |
| in personal or spiritual growth or self-help, it is worth | | | | and how we react. It is of course us who are |
| reflecting on what is meant by these words and on | | | | choosing to react, although we think it has come from |
| how it is useful. | | | | another. We internally generate the feelings, which we |
| "Take responsibility" might for example be said by one | | | | have learned to do habitually from our previous life |
| person to another, meaning "you take charge of this | | | | experience - and we can if we choose, respond |
| and sort it". This might be about a task, about being | | | | differently. This is the power of taking responsibility. |
| accountable, being the originator of something, and so | | | | We can deal with ourselves and life differently. |
| on. In this article I will look at the term from a | | | | This way of looking at our experience has become |
| psycho-spiritual direction, taking its meaning to a deeper | | | | merged with Eastern as well as some Western |
| level. Here, it might be a whole attitude to how you live | | | | mystical spiritual traditions. In meditation, for example, if I |
| your life. In self-help or self-improvement, you might be | | | | take my awareness within, focusing perhaps on my |
| deciding to take responsibility for your life and move it | | | | breath, I may notice my mind at work but by practice I |
| on in some way for the better. | | | | can become consciously aware of my mind, and that I |
| In terms of how we live our lives in the West the idea | | | | am not my mind, that I am a witness of my mind, that I |
| of being in charge of ourselves, responsible for how | | | | am more than just my mind. As such I can contact a |
| we live and the choices we make, this approach is | | | | vastly more profound self that exists beyond the |
| key. According to this belief, each person is responsible | | | | superficial chattering of my ego. This is a conscious, |
| for his or her own destiny. S/he is in the driving seat. It | | | | intentional use of awareness to manage my state and |
| is part of the Western notion of freedom. In this | | | | enter a higher level of experience and inner |
| tradition that goes back at least to Jean Jacques | | | | contentment. I am using responsibility to respond to my |
| Rousseau if not earlier, "man is born free and | | | | inner state of being. |
| everywhere he is in chains". His path in life is to assert | | | | Being personally responsible, in this sense, means I |
| his natural right to his freedom. Frequently, however, | | | | seek to live from a conscious awareness of myself at |
| this belief has sat uneasily alongside other beliefs about | | | | my core, my essence, my Self, my Oneness, or |
| one's obligations to others and the community and | | | | whichever tradition you are comfortable with. |
| others' obligations to oneself, the power of the | | | | We often state this as being centered in oneself. This |
| community, the social order, the state, and so on. | | | | is however an art that needs to be developed, and |
| According to the "Third Force" humanistic psychology | | | | hence the great value of adopting some self-help |
| of the 50's and 60's, such as Carl Rogers or Abraham | | | | practice. Taking responsibility becomes a practice of |
| Maslow, I am a personally responsible being. According | | | | intentionally using awareness and focusing the mind. It |
| to this approach, I am responsible for my life in that I | | | | involves an act of will. I become aware of what is |
| consciously create my experience and what occurs in | | | | occurring in me, I take responsibility and I choose to do |
| my life. This took things to a deeper level. Being | | | | something about it. I use my mind to manage my mind, |
| responsible meant being consciously aware of what | | | | by becoming aware of my thoughts and exercising a |
| was occurring in my life, as opposed to living | | | | choice about them, which could be for example to |
| unconsciously. I would be responding to my "candle | | | | take action on them, to think differently or to let them |
| flame", my inner awareness. I was becoming | | | | go. I am no longer a victim of my own stream of |
| responsive. I was the author of my destiny. Being the | | | | consciousness, the meanderings of my mind. I |
| "author", according to the Oxford English Dictionary, is | | | | consciously choose to not let it go in negative and |
| not only one who writes but also one who originates, | | | | ultimately self-detrimental or self-destructive directions. I |
| causes or gives rise to something. Hence we become | | | | develop my self-awareness, so that I become more |
| our own authority on ourselves. In psychotherapy or | | | | and more aware over time of my emotional, mental |
| counselling, the client thus became the best authority | | | | and spiritual patterns, and I use my awareness to |
| on him or her self, as opposed to the interpretations of | | | | manage my state. As I am more able to use my |
| the psychoanalyst. | | | | awareness, and manage my mind, I increasingly |
| This way of thinking of course clashes with our | | | | develop an awareness of my centred self that lies |
| experience. We have usually learned as children that | | | | beyond these mental ramblings. And I come to rest in |
| others are responsible for our welfare. The process of | | | | inner peace. |
| growing, both physically and psychologically, is to | | | | This is the great power of responsibility. We can use |
| emancipate ourselves from the decisions of other and | | | | own capabilities to be master of our destinies and |
| also - and this is crucial - to be responsible for our own | | | | create our own inner peace and our capacity to be at |
| thoughts, feelings and behaviours, rather than to see | | | | one with others. For it follows that one who is at |
| them as caused by others, events, situations or life. | | | | peace with him or herself, knows intuitively how he or |
| This is a major psychological shift, one that many do | | | | she can be at one with others. But this is the subject |
| not find easy to do, or do it in parts of their lives while | | | | of another article. |
| not in others. For example, I might be perfectly able to | | | | |